- 7 Big Mistakes Gay Couples Make During First Year of Relationship! - Couples Counseling Chicago
- 7 Big Mistakes Gay Couples Make During First Year of Relationship!
- 10 Ways to Keep Your Man
- 1. Know why you have chosen each other
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Nothing dims the flames of love faster than routine. Once you hit your relationship stride, it is easy to fall into the trap of routine. Surprise weekend trips, an exotic vacation, a new sport, trying something different in the bedroom…get out of your comfort zone and see where this takes you and your partner. Make sure you time take to show your partner that you prioritize your relationship. What are some of the ways you can do this? Dedicate one night each week to date night, where you try a new restaurant, go to the symphony, listen to a lecture at the local university…anything where you are doing something together.
Take time to focus on each other and talk…about your week, your work, your stresses and your successes. Remember the power of mere kissing and long hugs. Even if one of you is too tired for sex, a long, relaxing massage is a great way to communicate how much you value your partner. When you are with the right person, you want to do what it takes to make the relationship a success.
Fortunately, because you have chosen the right person, these things will not seem like chores! If your gay relationship is happy and mutually-enriching, putting into place these tips will seem natural. Good love is a priceless gift, and working to ensure that it lasts is worth it.
7 Big Mistakes Gay Couples Make During First Year of Relationship! - Couples Counseling Chicago
Know why you have chosen each other Remind yourself of the reasons past relationships have failed. Define relationship parameters from the get-go This is an important element for a successful gay relationship because it requires communicating with your partner to make sure you both are seeking the same type of relationship. Trust each other Nothing can put a damper on a budding relationship faster than jealousy. To a greater or lesser degree, gay couples seem more comfortable about this construct than others. For many same sex couples, this arrangement works out just fine, provided certain ground rules are set with mutually agreed upon boundaries.
Polyamory can also be an option for some gay men. The decision to have a threesome or to engage in one on one activity in the absence of your man should not be taken lightly. Once that horse is out of the barn, it cannot be put back in. New gay couples who move too quickly for an open relationship run the risk of disabling intimacy, increasing insecurity and damaging self-esteem. If you can identify with some or all of what has been mentioned here, you may benefit from learning more a about the unique dynamics involved in gay relationships. A great book to read authored by Jim Sullivan is: Boyfriend Inside you will find page after page of useful information that will help you gain a better understanding of how to set your relationship up for long term success.
- 6 Ways to Keep Your Gay Relationship Successful?
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One other resource we would like to recommend is our relationship report card. It only takes a few minutes to complete. This assessment can be used as a tool to help you gauge the general health and strength of the gay relationship you are in right now. The desire to be in a relationship and publicly identify as a gay couple is probably something you have long desired. If you have been in long-term relationships in the past, you already know how coupledom can be. You also realize that successful gay relationships take a great deal of patience and work. If the world of gay dating and romance is new to you, we encourage you to reflect upon the 7 tips offered here and talk to other gay men.
Counseling can also be helpful with identifying your relationship patterns.
7 Big Mistakes Gay Couples Make During First Year of Relationship!
By educating yourself more about the unique dynamics of same sex dating, you will empower yourself for healthier, stronger and more meaningful relationships in the future. We are including a poll below for you to vote in for fun. Be sure to come back and check out how others voted! Thanks for taking the time to read this post. Biggest Gay Couples Mistake. Premarital Counseling for Gays and Lesbians By: The truth is that had you asked me while I was growing up that I […].
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- 2. Define relationship parameters from the get-go?
Therapist for gay marriage counseling in Chicago — Lakeview By: I found this article to be very useful and full of great tips. Great article! I think I will be purchasing the book!! Gay Couples Dating Mistakes By: Couples Counseling Staff Are you in a gay relationship?
10 Ways to Keep Your Man
Continuing to frequent gay bars When two gay men start dating one another, there is a propensity to engage in activities that are familiar. Sends the message to others that one or both of you are available. Increased attention seeking from a place of competition.
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Impaired judgment due to potential over-drinking. Dating too soon too fast Some gay men decide to enter into a relationship with one another without first letting the wounds from the previous relationship heal. He continually talks about his ex. I also hear of more and more gay men, me included, who use gay-specific apps like Grindr, Scruff, and the likes, for making friends and networking.
1. Know why you have chosen each other
Not calling a spade a spade. If you can't be fully honest in your gay relationship about your app fetish, then your gay relationship won't be honest with you! Regular testing. Trust me, as someone who's been in my gay relationship for over 12 years, I know the value of being tested regularly — and so does my man.
Every healthy gay relationship gets tested We push buttons, ignore needs, and think we're the only one not getting the attention we desire.
Assuming your gay relationship is above being tested. Test, test, test or the relationship could go to rest. Of course, test out of love for yourself, for him, and for the good of the relationship. Avoiding money talks. Just because we're gay, it doesn't mean we're immune from having "money talks". If you can't talk about the big stuff, then the rest of the talks are just kinda fluff.
Not that money is everything, but when you start analyzing the water bill based on who was home more on which days of the month, it might be time to have a real conversation. Nickel and diming each other's spending habits in our heads, rather than banking on the fact that a real conversation about the state of the finances could lead to more cash in the love bank!
Zipping it about sex!
Shhh; let's not talk about sex. Gay men are supposed to be the kings of sex. Talking about sex seems to be everyone's hangup, even in a gay relationship. What doesn't get talked about doesn't get done I'm quite sure you have your own list of "mistakes" made, anticipate making, or refuse to admit you've made, in your trail of gay relationships. But remember that there are no mistakes: Now go find your man, give him a big, old smooch, slap him on his adorable butt, and tell him you love him. He may wonder what's gotten into you, but he'll also definitely feel good to know that he still turns your crank.
Hop to it! Ready to take your gay relationship to a whole new level of intimacy?